Wednesday, December 28, 2011


Rule #105: Games of Destruction - a better way to kill people.

Let's not fool ourselves. We all have abundant little frustrations in our daily lives that encourage in us uncharacteristic homicidal tendencies (that are actually fitting of MY nature, but I am not speaking merely for myself). If you live where I live, auto-rickshaws, trucks, buses and their respective drivers are just a few of the imbiciles you encounter while travelling to work. Then, of course, there's the imbiciles at work, which is a more universal issue.

Anyway, my point here is that if you've managed to keep your hands deep inside your pockets all day (to keep you from strangling those people and yourself), your first desire when you reach home is to destroy something. Some of us choose to channel it onto our sibling's belongings, the general happiness of our families, or our soon-to-fall-anyway strands of hair.

The solution? Instead of making your whole house a battlefield, try your TV or computer.
I own the PlayStation 3. It is man's gift to man. It is also man's gift to the police, the damned-idiot drivers and all the others that have survived the wrath of angry, belligerent teenagers.

My favourite genre of stress-buster games are FPS (First Person Shooter) or TPS (Third Person Shooter) games. Some fantasy games don't actually have any shooting, but definitely make the cut with some supremely mind-blowing weaponry. The God of War trilogy and Assassin's Creed series are the cream of the crop. My quick fix: An arcade game like Mortal Kombat or Super Street Fighter 4 really does the job when you just want to button-mash!

For avid gamers reading this, remember the GTA frenzy and how disturbingly relaxing it was to just run over people on the sidewalk with a stolen car till you reached Level 5 heat and then shoot down the helicopters? This is the evolution of that feeling!

Why is this the solution? Because games like these allow you to sit in the comfort of your own home and still climb Mount Olympus to destroy every Greek God that mythology spoke of. If you're more of a reality-gaming person, I'd recommend Call Of Duty: Black Ops or Modern Warfare 3 - they're the best games of their respective years. Who wouldn't want to pick up an AK 47 and blow a zombie's brains out? Or better still, who wouldn't want to control a tank turret gun or helicopter turret?
Oh, but here's the best part. The worst thing, and I mean the most horribly devastating thing, that could possibly happen to you is have your Mom or Dad walk into the room and yell because you had played 8 hours straight. Yes, that's right. NO REAL COPS, NO REAL GUILT, NO REAL BLOOD.
I see you finally get my point.

I've done a little research, asked around, and definitely played A LOT of games, just to put together a list of 10 highly recommended Games of Destruction and their trailers.

1. God Of War I, II, III
The PS3 had a special God of War III edition (which is the one I have). Here's the Official Chaos Launch trailer of the game.

2. Call of Duty: Black Ops, Modern Warfare 3
Here's the 2011 trailer for MW3. It's available for the Xbox360 too.

3. Assassin's Creed: Revelations
I loved this one the most; it's just genius. The then-Constantinople looks beautiful, and WHAT A STORY. Mind = blown.

4. The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
One of the top 10 most anticipated games of 2011. I've heard a whole bunch of my friends talk about it with girlish fever in their voices. Also, the next game that I plan to experience for myself.

5. Batman: Arkham Asylum, Arkham City
I didn't get enough time with Asylum, sadly, but dissected as much as I could of Arkham City. With every swoop, thug-kill and villain destruction, the game just gets better and better.

6. Mortal Kombat 9
It's the NINTH game. I'm not giving you a description. All I'm saying is that Kratos is a playable character. HOW AWESOME IS THAT?!

7. Super Street Fighter IV
One of the best arcade games to ever exist. Definitely more technical that MK9 and Tekken, but that's what's so addictive about it.

8. Red Dead Redemption
GTA on a horse, with a lasso and old-time shotguns and pistols. The tagline says "Outlaws to the End." I have one word for the game: Yeehaw!

There's a whole bunch of some very very epic games that I haven't listed. I've heard Saint's Row 3 and Battlefield 3 are forces to be reckoned with. I'll update this once I've played them!

To conclude, I'd say buy these games, slowly but surely. If not merely abate your road-rage (which reminds me, RoadRage was a fantastic game back then), they'll give you something better to do instead of drinking yourself silly to deal with a dull weekend.
I apologise for the ridiculous amounts of brackets and wish you a world of destruction in your near future!

Saturday, December 17, 2011


Rule #22: Cats are AWESOME.

I have a cat.
His name is Caesar, he's Persian by breed and he is awesome.

When I was born, we already had a cat, my mother's, in the house. That was the beginning of this abundant conviction that I now have.
He lived 18 years of his stray-tom-cat life as a perfect gentle-cat (I can't really say gentleman because he, fortunately, wasn't human).

Now, Caesar is exactly the opposite, though it doesn't make him any less loveable! He's what Captain Haddock would call a bungling baffoon. Contrary to belief, he is not graceful. He eats, sleeps, chases dust particles, is petrified of anything bigger than a fly that is not a fly or cockroach, and talks to crows every morning from the window sill. When he kills something, it goes SPLAT.
He also eats hot chapattis with us, loves egg yolk, and mews loudly for five minutes before taking his evening dump.

Most people don't believe animals are capable of anything beyond instincts, and that their instincts are pretty much the same within a species. With cats, and dogs too, I've found that this isn't true at all. Every cat is different, just like different people from different parts of the world. Strays are more territorial, house cat breeds (like the Persian or Scottish Fold) are fussy about where you can and can't pet them, who they're living with and who's visiting the people they're living with, and then each cat is different depending on their environment. My cat? He thinks he's a dog and follows one of us around all day.

So after all this, why are cats awesome? I've compiled a bunch of links that might help you understand this rule.

Number One: OMGSOCUTE: Please scroll to the end, and please also click on all the pictures and videos that aren't featured in this list.

In case that hasn't already convinced you...

Number Two: Ninja Kitty: I've tried this with a friend's cat. It's legit. They ALL do it. (Except mine because he thinks he's a dog)
Ninja Cat

Return Of the Ninja Cat: Bad Short Term Memory = WIN

Number Three: Cat Wrestling

Kitty Wrestling

CatBoxing Fail

Number Four: Something we've all grown up watching (or grown up and watched):

Cat Concerto

Number Five: My Tribute, My Eulogy: I've written a tribute to my other cat we had, who we got home with Caesar. She passed away in 2006 and her name was Cleo.
Here's the link: To The Dearest -

And finally...
Number Six: My Cat and I.

To end, I'd just like to say that I love animals - from cats and dogs to iguanas and snakes - even though my heart goes out to "the divine feline".
So far, most animals have liked me too.

A big thanks to my mother for never ever saying, "If you misbehave, then the cat/dog/other animal-in-the-vicinity will bite you" and for being the animal lover that she is.
Another big bunch of warmth and thanks to Arjun Kanungo, Abhishek Kamdar, Nisha Vasudevan and Alfred Lee, and for accepting me for the kitty-freak that I am, being kitty-freaks with me and sharing every cute cat video and picture they come across. They always make my day!